Say No to Second Chances

They say that in my previous life I died when I was 18. 
They say that in my previous life I died crashing to the ground.
They say that in my previous life I burnt to death.

They say...

Reincarnation. Second chances. 

I question the second chances when in the first life one died so young that they still died, just as that; young. No hurts, trials, struggles. No pain that shapes you into the adult figure whose life is ruled by consciousness. The adult figure who no longer knows the difference between what is right and wrong, but rather knows the difference between what is acceptable and what is not. 

The vessel that allows us to grow should only be carried through one life time. One struggle. 

Why do our souls feel the constant need to develop, to learn, to grow, to feel, to deal? They say we never remember the hurt that we experienced in the past life until we have crossed over and all our memories from history to now to tomorrow collapse on us and we aren't able to control the growth that occurs. The growth, we apparently, crave. 

One lifetime. 

I don't agree with what they say.

In one lifetime I have learnt more than I ever wanted or needed to learn. 
If I died so young in history, then why do I need what feels like a thousand lifetimes of pain and lessons and struggles and woes to wrapped into one lifetime to make me feel like I know what emotions are, that makes me feel like I can define each emotion. 

Do you think when we are on the other side, we know what we are getting ourselves into when we sign the contract with 'God'? Do you think we fully understand what we are going to feel... to go through? Or do you think we just hurt extra... or are even happier... in certain moments because in that split moment it's a piece of history, a piece of what we have already learnt merging with what we are experiencing today? You know our human shells can't handle that, right? Is that a reason why so many of us break?

Do you think we knew it would be this hard to try and finish just one lifetime?

I wonder what they would say. 

When I die, I think I would politely take the paper offered to me and tear it up. Burn the pieces and walk away from the chance of accepting another lesson in 'school'. Sometimes, you need to learn when to graduate and if reincarnation exists, I say, when I die, there will be no coming back. I'll have graduated instead - lessons overcome or not.

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